Author's Note: This poem is the result of both a word association and a string of thoughts that popped into my mind right before I fell asleep. I had this list of words in front of me and just couldn't decide what I wanted to do. I finally put it to rest and decided I'd go back to it in the morning. Just as I was about to shut my laptop screen, I had a flow of memories fill my mind and I started to type immediately. I never write like this, simply typing without really thinking too much about what it is I'm typing, but for this poem I did. I'm not sure if I am overall pleased with the poem as I may go back and edit it, but I liked the idea behind it at least. Lastly, please note that the person I am referring to in the poem is my sister. Comment below and let me know what you think.
Resting in deep snow,
Listening to flakes softly falling,
Buried within silence
Winter is calling
In this proud igloo we lay,
Our heads facing open sky
Staring intently --
Thoughts way up high
Our only care in the world --
Only worry of the night,
Is to finish our castle
Before the moon casts its light
Hopeful stars in the sky,
A wonderful night it will be,
A wonderful night,
Just you and me
I think it's lovely. Where did you get the igloo image from? That is really excellent. I like the notion of looking up into the sky together with someone, and building the castle together. what a sweet thought.
ReplyDeleteAlso, how did you find closed form? Was it easy, or hard? It worked well here, and perhaps because it is a shorted piece, it doesn't get that sing-song quality that closed form can do at times.
I loved your poem. It was so sweet. It's such a sweet winter scene with somebody that you love. I thought your poem flowed really well and it was beautiful. Amazing!
ReplyDeleteThanks! I got the igloo image from the intricate igloo/castle like homes we made out of snow. And as far as the closed form goes, I wasn't even sure if it was closed form or not but I suppose because of the rhyming it is. It actually wasn't very difficult at all surprisingly. My third stanza already rhymed unintentionally so I just decided to make the rest rhyme also. I've noticed that closed form is becoming easier and easier for me. Thanks for the input:)
ReplyDeleteKnowing you and your family, I'm sure your sister is proud that you were thinking of her in such high regard. Even though you two are so different, the writing here shows exactly how much you enjoy spending time with her and how much you love her. Great job.
ReplyDeleteI thought the poem was beautiful, and your sister must be happy that you wrote something nice about her. I really enjoyed how much description and voice was in it. I also thought that it was good how you wrote all of this right before going to sleep.
ReplyDeleteSo beautiful! Your poem is very descriptive; I can see everything in this poem. It flowed really well and it all seems so real. Incredible!
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